This song makes me emotional. It is such a sad state to be in when the three most beautiful, wonderful words become hard to say, when you know you have to go and leave the memories behind.

Load the car and write the note.
Grab your bag and grab your coat.
Tell the ones that need to know.
We are headed north.

One foot in and one foot back.
But it don’t pay to live like that.
So I cut the ties and I jumped the track.
For never to return.

Ahh Brooklyn, Brooklyn take me in.
Are you aware the shape I’m in?
My hands they shake, my head it spins.
Ahh Brooklyn, Brooklyn take me in.

When at first I learned to speak.
I used all my words to fight.
With him and her and you and me.
Ahh, but it's just a waste of time.
Yeah it’s such a waste of time.

That woman she’s got eyes that shine.
Like a pair of stolen polished dimes.
She asked to dance I said it’s fine.
I’ll see you in the morning time.
Ahh Brooklyn, Brooklyn take me in.
Are you aware the shape I’m in?
My hands they shake, my head it spins.
Ahh Brooklyn, Brooklyn take me in.

Three words that became hard to say.
I and Love and You.
What you were than I am today.
Look at the things I do.

Ahh Brooklyn, Brooklyn take me in.
Are you aware the shape I’m in?
My hands they shake, my head it spins.
Ahh Brooklyn, Brooklyn take me in.

Ahh Brooklyn, Brooklyn take me in.
Are you aware the shape I’m in?
My hands they shake, my head it spins.
Ahh Brooklyn, Brooklyn take me in.

Dumbed down and numbed by time and age.
You’re dreams that catch the world the cage.
The highway sets the travelers stage.
All exits look the same.

Three words that became hard to say.
I and Love and You.
I and Love and You.
I and Love and You.

Today on the Dr. Phil show was a married couple with marital problems. The husband, a body builder and a trainer, buffed and tanned is cheating on his wife, a pretty faced but slightly overweight woman who is the mother of his two children.

They have been married for 10 years and in those years the husband has been cheating with about a hundred girls according to the wife. She said that her husband has a bad temper and have hurt her physically in some occasions too. The husband acknowledges and does not deny these facts about him but continued to say when asked, that he will never be a devoted, faithful husband to his wife or to anyone. What an arrogant, full-of-it-sonna-ma-gun. He admits that he is manipulative too. But with all these I have to say that he was honest. Weird to say about a cheating husband, but you see, the wife knew all those times she had been cheated on. This was the husband's excuse and the fact that his wife has gotten "fat". He says that after he cheats, his wife takes him back and he knows his wife will always take him back so he continues to cheat again and again.

They are now getting a divorce. It is so easy to do this when you are married in the United States. Good for them.

It is very hard to hang on to a marriage that has been deteriorating for a long time, most especially when a spouse is immature, superficial, and does not share your goals and values. Women, please take care of yourselves when entering into a relationship. It is so important that you hold on to your self-esteem so that no man can manipulate you and make decisions for you. Looking good should be coming from the inside, beauty should not be superficial so you do not end up with men who would hurt you and leave you once your look and body has changed. And please ladies, let us have respect to ourselves and to each other. Do not date a man who is already married! Go and get your own! Because if he is cheating on his wife, what makes you think he is not going to cheat on you? And Mr. Good Looking who thinks he is all that, you will get old too, "gravity will kick in", you can take all the pills and help you need to make your weapon operative but let me tell you... what goes around comes around. You will end up alone and the fun you think you are having now will be nothing but the cause of your pain in the future. Your measure of being a man is nothing but a shallow, empty, and superficial being that you are. You are not invincible. No one is.

Have you ever heard of the song, "What's Forever For" by Michael Martin Murphey? This song makes me emotional. I know that this song is for all relationships out there but it is in marriage where two people literally offer each other to love forever. When two people vow to love each other forever, I wonder why is it then that some marriages end?

Some people do not believe in the sanctity of marriage anymore because of the high rate of divorce. Some people feel that marriage is only a contract, a piece of paper that is not enough to guarantee forever. But for me, marriage is not just a contract, it is more than a promise --- it is a sacred vow. Marriage is a blessing, not only you are committing yourself to this person but it is as if you are making a shout out to the world proclaiming, "Here I am in front of all of you.... witness my love to this person as I dedicate my life to him/her."

But marriage oftentimes fail. It fails for a lot of different and valid reasons for the people involved. Marriage afterall, is a relationship between two people who are both subject to failures and imperfections. But what differs marriage from just any other relationships is the blessing from God, or to some the legality that makes the union lawfully acceptable and recognized.

Once married, the couple enters into a higher and deeper level of relationship.
They now must hold on to each other for they are building their lives together as one---thus the need for foundations.

I believe that these are the five foundations a couple must have in marriage:
1. Honor. I put honor on the top of the list because it is the one that we must hang on to when dealing with other people. When we are with other people, we are not only representing our own but whatever it is we do affect and reflect our spouse directly or indirectly. If we have honor in all our dealings, we have respect, we value decency, we practice honesty.
Between spouses, treating each other with respect is very important. "I respect your feelings. I will not do anything to hurt your feelings."

2. Loyalty. Loyalty is to support each other all the way. It means you are faithful to your vows, that you will be with each other through thick and thin, in sickness and in health, for better or for worse." I will be here with you no matter what it takes, I will take care of you." Loyalty is also simply being faithful.

3. Love. Love is so much more than what you feel for each other and is so much more than physical attraction. Because human is bound to fail, to make mistakes and is imperfect, it is through love that we look beyond each others shortcomings and instead accept each other for who and what we are. I believe that love is not blind but rather looks beyond the imperfections with open heart and mind. Love is always saying we are sorry for our mistakes, for being weak knowing that we could be better, for causing pain to our spouse. Love is passionate, it is a feeling that needs to be transpired, it is our touch, our warmth, our kiss, our expression of adoration and affection. Love is always a two way street, is a tango, is something that must be reciprocated. " I love you and I want to be here with you each morning and night because I want to witness and share your life with me as I am sharing it with you."

4. Communication. Because a lot of things happen in our daily lives, it is very important to communicate our thoughts and feelings. Openness allows us to make a connection with each other. It is a good way to share humor, to express sincerity, to set a compromise and meet in the middle, to discuss expectations, to work things out, to speak up and to listen. Open communication allows us to not be afraid of who we really are inside because we know that our spouse is willing to listen and understand us. "How can I make this better? I know we are a team and we are in this together."

5. Patience is last but not the least. It is not to be mistaken with apathy because with patience, we still show that we care. There will always be times that our patience will be tested by our spouse, times when we want to burst in anger when a spouse just does not listen, does not cooperate, does not understand, simply does not do things you want him/her to do. Patience is the key to make or break our day. We should be able to practice tolerance and distinguish which small things we can let go and which big things need to be discussed. Patience is important in determining if something is worth arguing about or not. Patience, in the long run pays off as it brings calm rather than noise in the relationship, in the long run determines if you can truly accept the person you married for who and what he/she is and live with that person for the rest of your life. "Dear, since I know you do not like asking for directions, and that you know how important it is for me that we get there on time, I have taken the liberty to use the google map."

Marriage to me is not only an agreement but the ultimate seal of that love that no man or woman should be allowed to break. And because of this reason, I truly believe that if people are truly, madly, deeply in love with each other, they will always find a way to be together --- no matter what. If the marriage has fallen, it is simply because the foundations were not strong enough in the first place and thus was not able to stand the tests of time. There is no guarantee for anyone that their marriage is the one that will last forever, but with strong foundations we can rest assure that our marriage can survive any storm one at a time.

It's the hardest thing to do, to forgive...when someone you love has caused you pain, betrayed you, left you or took you for granted, when someone you love does not reciprocate the affection you give.

But we love anyway. We love because it is the most human thing to do... the very reason of our existence. But not at all times that our love is meant to be...that because we love it is a happy ending. Sometimes that "love" was just to teach us a lesson, to help us know ourselves better, and to enrich our lives. But all of these are unattainable if we are not able to forgive the "love" that caused us heartache.

Forgetting is not the same as forgiving. Forgiving is more powerful and unless you forget you are not really forgiving. Love cannot stand alone without forgiveness and forgiveness shall not shine without forgetting the past, the pain, and the sorrow. When we forgive we must forget all the negatives associated with the pain that make our heart cry. When we forgive, we free ourselves from the poison of hate and we start over a new beginning. It is through forgiving that we are thankful of the chance to experience how to love, for the friendship that existed... When we forgive, we give ourselves a chance to be better. When we forgive, our burden becomes light.

Love is forgiving. To forgive is to love.To forgive is to not keep records of wrongs. To forgive is to heal. To forgive is the hardest thing to do but it is the cure for an aching heart.

~ litlmisscaffeine~

This happened today. Justin is 7 years old and he wants to go out to the park with his friend Mia. I just had a preview of the future. And the future goes like this.

Justin is on the phone sitting next to me. I could hear the conversation because the phone's volume was up.

Justin: Hi it's Justin, can I please speak to Mia?
Mia: Hi, so you want to come in?
Justin: No, I am not there yet. I'm in my room.
Mia: I know that. But are you coming?
Justin: Yes, I'm gonna pick you up. Ok?
Mia: Ok. Just knock on the door.
Justin: Ok, bye.

Justin hangs up the phone and puts on his shoes.
I asked, "Do you want your big brother to go with you?"
Justin replies, "No," and rushes out to the door.

I was left astounded. Did I just hear what I heard? My baby Justin is picking up a girl? What!? The inevitable comes too quickly. Oh well.


Justin @ 8 months old.

What do you do if there is infidelity in your relationship? Do you take it all in and cry your heart out when you are alone blaming yourself or thinking what it is you have done wrong? Do you let all your anger and frustration be felt by the other person who hurt you by firing bullets of painful words? Or do you seek help from other sources such as counseling, or people you trust like your friends and or family?

It is a difficult situation to be in. Not only it is difficult, it is also heartbreaking. You feel betrayed, humiliated, violated. You feel lost and angry, sad and confused why this has happened. Crying your heart out (male or female) helps. It releases that block of emotions inside your system. While getting angry and letting yourself be heard is also a natural reaction, it is only useful depending upon how you are communicating your message. Seeking the opinion or advices from other people sometimes help and sadly sometimes fuel your anger some more which makes things even more complicated.

Keep in mind that you are in a relationship with this person because of a mutual understanding and feeling which is called LOVE. And as natural as LOVE is, INFIDELITY is just right there in almost every corner.

Now if you are in this sad situation, the first thing to ask yourself is: Do I still love this person? If the answer is "yes" then you must simply let that love shine above all that is negative surrounding the heart and mind. The partner who is being unfaithful is the one who is lost, not you. Talk to your partner, lead the way back to where your relationship should be by communicating what went wrong and work on ways to rekindle what was lost whether it is romance, spiritual or mental connection. The one who is hurting is ultimately the one who can end the pain. It is not easy to be the bigger person but because you love, and if you believe in that love, you shall emanate all that is emanated by love: forgiveness, humility, and hope.

I have been surrounded by relationships. All of us are surrounded by relationships. At close hand, I know the ups and down of loving someone. I have seen how love conquers all and experienced a love's downfall. But of course we all LOVE anyway. Not all relationship ends in a happy ending. But who's to say what is a happy ending anyway? Life does not end just because a relationship failed. You can either move on with this relationship and try your best to make it work, or move on and be happy to welcome a new one. The sad part of infidelity is when a good relationship is destroyed. But then again, it is you who knows if the relationship is worth saving or not. Both parties should try to feel how it is to be in each other's shoes. Ask the question, "What would you feel if I had done this you?" To the infidel, would you want your partner to do this to you? And if she would have done this to you, would it be okay that she would offend you again and again? Of course not. To the victim, if you were the one who was weak and committed infidelity, would you not want to be given a second chance to prove that you can be a better person? Keep in mind the golden rule my friends. It is there for we can learn from it. And remember that the golden rule goes both ways.

LOVE is powerful. Believe that your LOVE is special, strong and true and so it shall be. May LOVE always guide all of us in heart, mind and spirit. ~ litlmisscaffeine