Sometimes when we lose sense of who we are, we seek advice from people we trust because they give us the boost we need, the cheer that we can do it, the picker upper for the day. Or we turn to self quizzes, read the computerized assessment about us and we find ourselves smiling, thinking that, "Oh yeah, I am that."

Below is a result from a self quiz I took from Facebook.
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The True Believer .
You've been through a lot in your life. Broken and bruised, you still keep going. You tend to hold promises dear to yourself. You would never lie to yourself. You ...believe in people and you see the true beauty in everything. Family and friends, whether small or big, you keep them close to you; they mean everything to you. You couldn't bear to break anyone; it would hurt you the most. You don't believe in happy endings, but you do believe that there is always light to every dark; hope to every lost cause; beauty in the filth; two sides to every story. You believe that no one should be alone; you've been through that as well. Congratulations, true believer; keep being honest to yourself and others. Let no one tell you otherwise. You walk a long road, believer... Don't stop..>


another one I like... =)

Your Passion Type
You mix passion with pragmatism

Key Traits: open, sensitive, balanced, empathetic, loyal, thoughtful Introspective and self-aware, you have a solid grip on your emotions. Your friends and family consider you "the rock" they can turn to and lean on during tough times. Part of that trust comes from the fact that you always try your best to say what you mean and mean what you say. This is part of your healthy outlook on life, love and work. Hard work is important, but remember to listen to your instinct when it tells you to take a step back and enjoy the quiet moments. There are certain things that you will always be passionate about, whether it's a certain cuisine, a type of music, or a particular sport. On the flipside, there are also things that will never interest you. But that's OK. Your romantic partner appreciates your unwavering sensibility, your balanced temperament, and consistent signs of love and care.

There's something about a farmer's lifestyle that is heartwarming. I can't pinpoint if it's the barn animals, the big farm house, the wide luscious green acres, the aromatic flowers, the brightly colored fruits, the soothing gentle breeze, the warm sun, the friendly neighbours with their inviting smile and delicious pies.

I am definitely not in Yellowknife at this very moment.

See how amazingly freezing Yellowknife is! I know, it is freezing but can still be amazing.
Okay, enough said. Enjoy the video ^_^

- "It's gorgeous today in Yellowknife.... until you go out."
- "The sun is bright and yellow... but don't be fooled. It is freaking cold!"
- "A day can start out wrong but flow really smoothly."
- "Sometimes I wish there is a camera for words inside my head. A fast camera that can capture these flying, running, all over the place words."
- "I also sometimes wish I can mute my brain. It does get loud."
- "I think my mind blabber too much. But if my mouth does the blabbering, you'll definitely think I am going crazy."
- "Today is great because it is!"
- "I have so much energy or maybe because I drink too much coffee? Hmmmnnn..."
- "My boys bore me sometimes. All they want to do is play PS3 and Xbox 360. I tell them they are lucky I don't like playing these games or else they will have to face a real competitor."
- "Today is Friday and we had a lovely big breakfast today: bacon and eggs, toasts, and potato patties! I really love breakfast! It is my favorite meal of the day. I love it most when it happens between 6:00 to 9:00 in the morning."
- "Now I miss my mama who I used to have breakfast with at Tim Horton's. Sometimes at McDonald's."
- "It is 3:56 in the afternoon and I am talking about breakfast. Weird."
- "For the very first time, I actually am enjoying this doing nothing situation. Wait, is writing this blog "doing nothing"? Hmmmnn...."
- "I really have to shut this mind of mine. Shut up! shut up!"
- "Ok, this has got to stop. What to do, what to do?"
**scatches head**
**watches Janvier play PS3**
**thinks of Jesse who is playing and watching Toy Story 3 in the bedroom**
**sees Justin who is busy playing with his Lego in his bedroom**
**looks out the window**
- "It's starting to get daaAaark!"
- "It's 4:00 in the afternoon! Already?"
- "Okay, gotta go! I have to get ready to meet my husband and get some groceries!"
- "Maybe Apple can come up with a recording device that can capture the words in my mind without me speaking it. Maybe."
- "Ok, bye!"
- "Sorry, I wasted your time."
-"I did not waste mine though. Feel good about that. I mean you. You should feel good about the fact I did not waste my time. You did a good thing here. Reading my crazy random thoughts. Thank you."

I think the reason why it is hard for me to relax is because I still hang on the workaholic side of me... the one who is always out and about, juggling, multitasking --- always hectic. And now that I am home with my toddler, I feel that my sense of being has diminished. I feel that doing nothing is in itself laziness and is not good for my brain.

Today is -37C. I just cancelled a doctor's appointment because it is too cold to bring Jesse outside. And it hit me how fortunate I am to be able to stay inside the house and not be obliged to go out in the cold. I remember how dreadful of a battle it was to get up at 5:30 in the morning and get ready for work during winter.

So today I want to make note of how much I appreciate this opportunity of being able to stay home. I will try my best to relax and keep in mind that not everybody is given this chance... a chance to have a break, a really long break from the world of busy, hectic, almost robotic, working people. And that this long break is for me to enjoy because it is only temporary that I will soon be back to my old workaholic me again before this year ends. I will not beat myself up with the mindset that I am less worthy, or that I have little self value just because I am doing nothing. Because today, I am really not doing nothing--- I am relaxing.

At this moment of my life I realize that my life is not mine in a sense that it belongs to my sons. There are times that I think to myself and wonder if I was not a mother. I think of the things that I could do, the freedom I could have, the fullest potential I could achieve with no one to worry about but me. Being a mother is not always peachy... and not at all times rewarding. It is not a story that is only filled with happy moments but a story that is also a picture of sacrifice, chaos, tears and screams. Motherhood is not always neat because it is also messy. It is a story of things always somewhere in between.

Today is a good day than yesterday. Today, Jesse slept at 3:30 in the morning and slept without scratching and bleeding. Yesterday, he slept at 8:00 in the morning because of his eczema. Both of us were already too tired but he just would not sleep. So today, compared to yesterday, is much much better.

To help him sleep, I play a CD of lullaby songs. And this one is one of my favorites. It was actually a poem. I thought that this poem perfectly tells my thought of how I feel about my life now as a mother. I do not want to think of the things I could have done if I was not a mother and be on the top having reached my full potential as a career woman. I know of few women who were driven by power where their roles as a mother were affected. But I also do not want to just sit down and no longer dream and drive myself to be much more than who I am now. So at this point, I shall be in the middle... it isn't really anywhere, it is somewhere else instead.

Halfway down the stairs
Is a stair where I sit:
There isn't any other stair quite like it.
I'm not at the bottom,
I'm not at the top:
So this is the stair where I always stop.

Halfway up the stairs
Isn't up, and isn't down.
It isn't in the nursery, it isn't in the town:
And all sorts of funny thoughts
Run round my head:
"It isn't really anywhere! It's somewhere else instead!"

I have been keeping a secret. I really miss the sun. Yellowknife feels like a box. A closed one and it is dark inside.